I hadn’t planned on a follow-up post to yesterday’s Songs About Heathens – it just sort of came about naturally. For what it’s worth, I found twice as many good “Believer” songs as “Heathen” ones. And one group here had two hit songs with that word in their titles. Go figure! Enjoy! ~ JH
1) The Monkees ~ “I’m A Believer”
2) American Authors ~ “Believer”
3) twenty one pilots ~ “Oh, Ms. Believer”
4) Morcheeba ~ “Make Believer”
5) Neil Young ~ “The Believer”
6) Giant ~ “I’m A Believer”
7) Ronnie Milsap ~ “True Believer”
8) Chantal Kreviazuk ~ “Believer”
9) The Black Crowes ~ “Walk, Believer, Walk”
10) Bill Anderson ~ “Liars One, Believers Zero”
11) Christina Milian ~ “Believer”
12) Level 42 ~ “Believers”
13) B.B. King ~ “Midnight Believer”
14) Phil Keaggy ~ “True Believers”
15) Nanci Griffith ~ “The Last Of The True Believers”
16) Freemasons ft. Wynter Gordon ~ “Believer”
17) Darius Rucker ~ “True Believers”
18) The Cult ~ “True Believers”
19) 38 Special ~ “Stone Cold Believer”
20) Jazzanova ~ “Believer”
21) Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros ~ “Dear Believer”
22) Tonéx ~ “Believer”
23) Mark Chesnutt ~ “Thank God For Believers”
24) Audio Adrenaline ~ “Believer”
25) Iron Butterfly ~ “Stone Believer”
26) Michael Schenker Group ~ “Rock & Roll Believer”
27) The Monkees ~ “Daydream Believer”
28) Jim Ed Brown & Helen Cornelius ~ “Born Believer”
"What will he come up with next?" I like to keep you guessing. Here's a small but potent collection of Songs About Heathens. Mostly, I'm posting these because I really like the first song. But the rest of the tunes ain't half bad, either. Enjoy! ~ JH
Here's the natural follow-up to yesterday's post, this one featuring Things These Artists WON'T do. Snarky song commentary is included at no extra charge. Enjoy! ~ JH
1) Tom Petty ~ “I Won’t Back Down” (Tom Petty plus TWO former Beatles in the video? Yes, please!)
2) Jason Mraz ~ “I Won’t Give Up” (I think he means it, too. Just listen to the earnestness in his voice.)
3) Rascal Flatts ~ “I Won’t Let Go” (This guy’s voice is almost good enough to ignore those Guy-Fieri-inspired frosted tips. Almost.)
4) Charlie Puth ~ “I Won’t Tell A Soul” (His lips are sealed.)
5) Selah Sue ~ “I Won’t Go For More” (And we won’t stay for less. Deal?)
6) James Morrison ~ “I Won’t Let You Go” (I bet there were a lot of ticked-off drivers in the immediate area during the filming of this video.)
7) Tanya Tucker ft. Paul Overstreet & Paul Davis ~ “I Won’t Take Less Than Your Love” (That hair. Those clothes. Must be ‘80s country music. Heaven, help us!)
8) Carpenters ~ “I Won’t Last A Day Without You” (Okay, Richard, we get it. You have a lot of money, and you can afford as many cars as you want. Can we please just keep the focus on Karen next time? You, sir, are extraneous!)
9) A Great Big World ~ “Won’t Stop Running” (Nah, I just have something in my eye. You, too?)
10) Jane Monheit & Michael Bublé ~ “I Won’t Dance” (Sorry, I can’t help but ask. Even if she vows not to, and I’m not able to. #thatgorgeousvoice #JanesnotMichaels #hesokaytooiguess)
11) Anouk ~ “I Won’t Play That Game” (Which game? Monopoly? Clue? Candy Crush? Pokémon Go? Twister?)
12) Maroon 5 ~ “Won’t Go Home Without You” (Does anyone really believe that a woman would actually reject this guy? If my wife were typing this, she would probably say “nope.” So we’ll go with that.)
13) Sophie Ellis-Bextor ~ “I Won’t Change You” (That’s good, ‘cuz I’m pretty happy with myself the way I am. Mostly. Actually, not really all that much. On second thought, go ahead and change me!)
14) Reba McEntire ~ “I Won’t Mention It Again” (Thanks, Reba. I hate it when people keep bringing up the same old thing over and over again. Let it go, people!)
15) Lacuna Coil ~ “I Forgive (But I Won’t Forget Your Name)” (That’s fine. Just don’t mention it again, ‘kay?)
16) OK Go ~ “I Won’t Let You Down” (Every OK Go music video is a true work of art. Always entertaining! The music ain’t bad, either!)
17) Poison ~ “I Won’t Forget” (That hair. Those clothes. Must be ‘80s rock music. Heaven, help us!)
18) Sarah Blasko ~ “We Won’t Run” (She sings well, and she’s inside of a giant eyeball. That about sums it up.)
19) Building 429 ~ “We Won’t Be Shaken” (The band may not be shaken, but that small percussion instrument the guy was wielding at the beginning of the song sure was taking a shaking.)
20) Melissa Etheridge ~ “I Won’t Be Alone Tonight” (Of course you won’t, Melissa. There’s an audience right there in front of you.)
21) Princessa ~ “I Won’t Forget You” (“Any more no more” is a double negative. So…she’s saying that she’s totally going to forget you. Sorry, dude.)
22) Slade ~ “We Won’t Give In” (I was going to make some pithy comment about the song itself, but that jaunty red hat of the singer’s has got me so distracted that I’m dumbstruck.)
23) Big Head Todd And The Monsters ~ “We Won’t Go Back” (I don’t think they’re going back. Not to the way it was, at least.)
24) The Who ~ “Won’t Get Fooled Again” (I think this song is about politics, but I could be wrong. I hate songs about politics.)
25) The Colourist ~ “We Won’t Go Home” (You don’t have to go home, but you can’t stay here.)
We hear a lot of empty promises these days, especially from political candidates. But these artists mean business! When they say they will do something, you can count on it! (Maybe. Probably not, actually. Just more empty promises. Anyway...) Here's a collection of songs in which the singer or band vows that "I Will" or "We Will" do...something. For fans of my (underused?) snarky song commentary (I'm talking to you, Entzminger!), you may be pleasantly surprised to find it here in spades. Enjoy! ~ JH
1) Everclear ~ “I Will Buy You A New Life” (This promised “new life” apparently includes: “A garden where your flowers can bloom…a new car, perfect, shiny, and new…[and] that big house way up in the West Hills.”)
2) Gloria Gaynor ~ “I Will Survive” (She really should’ve changed that stupid lock, though.)
3) Chris Tomlin ~ “I Will Rise” (I believe he said he was going to rise. Thirteen times, in fact. But who’s counting?)
4) Mumford & Sons ~ “I Will Wait” (These talented fellows are nothing if not patient.)
5) Us The Duo ~ “I Will Wait For You” (These two will wait for you, too. But can they play the banjo? That’s the real question, isn’t it?)
6) Whitney Houston ~ “I Will Always Love You” (All she’s taking with her are bittersweet memories. We both know she’s not what you need anyway.)
7) Jimmy Eat World ~ “I Will Steal You Back” (But what if I prefer to remain stolen, Jimmy Eat? Or whatever your real name is.)
8) Grateful Dead ~ “I Will Take You Home” (“Ain't no fog thick enough to hide you / Your daddy's gonna be right here beside you.” That’s either very reassuring or extremely creepy. Jury’s still out.)
9) Soul Asylum ~ “I Will Still Be Laughing” (This song is eighteen years old. That’s a long time to STILL be laughing. On an unrelated note, I don’t get the joke. Am I supposed to?)
10) Jimmy Buffett ~ “I Will Play For Gumbo” (Buffett for gumbo? Sounds like a pretty fair deal to me.)
11) Boyz II Men ~ “I Will Get There” (Was there ever any doubt? Seriously, when have Boyz II Men ever not gotten there when they promised to?)
12) Selah ~ “I Will Carry You” (Thank you for that. I was getting tired from all the walking.)
13) Slash ft. Myles & The Conspirators ~ “We Will Roam” (Additional charges may apply when making calls outside the geographical coverage area of the home network.)
14) Steven Curtis Chapman ~ “I Will Be Here” (But what if I go over “there”? Will you go “there,” too, or will you stay “here”?)
15) Katie Melua ~ “I Will Be There” (Never mind, Chapman. Katie will be “there,” so we’re all good!)
16) John Fogerty ~ “I Will Walk With You” (Okay, but let’s mix it up a bit and hopscotch our way to…wherever it is we’re going.)
17) Bruce Hornsby and the Noisemakers ~ “I Will Walk With You” (Thanks but no thanks, Bruce. Fogerty offered first, and we’re hopscotching. So…yeah.)
18) Jesus Culture ft. Kim Walker-Smith ~ “We Will Run” (Are you trying to trick me into doing a 5K? ‘Cuz…no.)
19) All-4-One ~ “I Will Be Right Here” (“Wherever you go, whatever you do, wherever you are…no matter how far, I'll always be near…I will be right here.” Yeah, that’s not stalker-ish at all!)
20) Peggy March ~ “I Will Follow Him” (Seriously, what’s with all this stalker-ish behavior? Pretty sure it’s illegal, folks!)
21) Burton Cummings ~ “I Will Play A Rhapsody” (You go ahead with your bad self, Burton! Play that rhapsody! We’re listening…)
22) Gladys Knight & The Pips ~ “I Will Fight” (Forgive me if I don’t tremble at the thought of people who call themselves “The Pips” threatening to fight anybody.)
23) Avalon ~ “We Will Stand” (Well, it sure beats sitting.)
24) Death Cab For Cutie ~ “I Will Follow You Into The Dark” (Then what will you do? Stab me? Shoot me? Let’s be honest. Nothing good is going to come of this dark pursuit.)
25) Queen ~ “We Will Rock You” (They did. And it was awesome. The End.)
